Emily in Paris

Fashion Victim Season 3 Episode 8 Editor’s Rating 4 stars ****

Emily in Paris

Fashion Victim Season 3 Episode 8 Editor’s Rating 4 stars ****

The gang is wearing black. Emily is wracked with guilt. “This was definitely you,” Julien says, making no effort to soothe her. This glib attitude tells me that there’s no way Pierre is actually dead, but you know what? I appreciate the funeral-garb-as-misdirect. And I like the idea that Sylvie would wear something this revealing for that purpose. Show off your sternum as long as you’re alive, I say. Emily went for a sort of bat-wing-shoulder situation, like a deranged, vampy pilgrim. Anyway, they are meeting Pierre at this garden of convalescence that looks like where Daniel Craig’s James Bond hid out with Vesper back when he was recovering from that enhanced interrogation (to use an American term of art). Pierre has a broken collarbone that belies a much DEEPER pain. And he doesn’t even know that Sylvie and these friends of his are working for his label while he is not!

Back at the office, Gregory — wearing a shiny green tinsel wig and sequin striped pants and a very loud jacket … talk about ringard!— reminds the Grateau agency staff that they work for him, not the other way around. Emily calls Nicolas, begging him to hold off on announcing Gregory’s appointment. Nicolas refuses, hangs up, and returns to more pressing matters: making out with Mindy. He tells her that he’s in a company apartment (THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN SAYING) and they bond over the burdens of being industry scions of domineering fathers. I am into Nicolas as an enemy for Emily! It absolutely tracks that he would be a douchebag (fashion nepo baby, very handsome and stupid rich, graduate of Swiss boarding school where he presumably learned douchebaggery among some of its finest practitioners) but that someone in Mindy’s situation (had a crush on him forever, see above re: handsomeness) wouldn’t clock it.

Emily reports Nicolas’s unwillingness to budge to Sylvie, who is not surprised. Then she takes matters into her own hands by calling in a grown-up: Nicolas’s dad. In a Beetlejuice-striped pantsuit that’s probably the least revealing outfit we’ve seen her wear in ages — noteworthy given the history we learn about at this lunch — Sylvie makes the play for Pierre to be allowed to leave with dignity. Because if he doesn’t, well … Sylvie insinuates that she could humiliate Louis by telling all the world about the sexual harassment (at the very least) he subjected her to back in her assistant days, tarnishing his legacy for good. So he caves. And then she stays for lunch! Incredible

At the club, we are finally spared Mindy’s illogical performances though not the illogical stagewear — a plastic outfit covered in safety pins … WHY? — and Nicolas confronts Emily about Sylvie’s talk with his dad. Nicolas assumes Emily had the idea to go over his head; I think it’s quite generous of Nicolas to assume Emily would think so strategically. But the situation is so hostile that Emily bails on their group dinner. On her way home, she gets a text from Gabriel, who could “use a friend now.” Love the sound of that!

Emily has on a great blue velvet suit and glittery slingbacks that Gabriel, who is absolutely blitzed on Japanese whisky, helpfully removes from her feet so she doesn’t have to worry about them falling into the canal. Gabriel saw Camille’s Instagram posts, which sure look like she’s all play and no work in Greece. He’s sure she’s cheating on him and will end things but says that it’s his fault. Emily, who as we know is incapable of taking responsibility for anything, says he cannot blame himself. But Gabriel says Camille cannot forgive him for “what happened between us” and goes on to issue more drunken proclamations of affection that he will probably forget he ever said but that will haunt Emily until the end of time: He loved her from the moment he saw her. (If you go back and revisit the moment he first saw her, this is an EXTREMELY funny thing for him to say: When they met, he told her he was from Normandy, and she said she only knew it from Saving Private Ryan, and when he didn’t immediately respond to that reference, she went, “D-Day?”)

The only catch: He loves Camille too. “The problem is I love you both and I’m going to end up with nothing,” he says. I am very proud of Emily for just holding the friendship line and getting his sloshed ass into his apartment without winding up in a more compromising position. Growth!

The next day, Sylvie and her team break the bad news to Pierre, who is still calling his nemesis “Gagory” (… you know why). As Pierre wails that he would only see this succession “over my dead body,” a light bulb goes off above Emily’s head and enormous puffy sleeves.

Time for the Pierre Cadault store opening, to which Mindy is wearing basically nothing but nude figure-skater mesh with three strategically placed black swirls. Emily looks excellent, actually. I like those black and metallic stripes on her. (The hair is a little done for my taste, but her bangs are looking sharp, as is her makeup.) Seemingly gracious in victory, Nicolas proposes a toast to his and Emily’s shared good fortune and then brings Mindy over to meet his family. Now, given how popular “Chen” is as a last name, I find it a little hard to believe that Louis immediately put together that Mindy must be the zipper heiress, but maybe all rich people know about each other and have a directory in their brains of all the key players? Knowing as we do that Louis is a creep, I am worried that Mindy is going to have an extremely gross encounter with him that will force her to end her relationship with Nicolas. (Nicolas will side with his dad because of course he will.)

Meanwhile, the Grateau gang gets to work starting the rumor that Pierre is only there “in spirit.” Emily goes so far as to call him “the late great Pierre Cadault.” Just as word of Pierre’s alleged demise makes it to Gregory, Pierre bursts through his hologram. Rumors of his death are … etc. “The truth is the brand is dead,” he announces. I’ll be honest: As satisfying as this surely was from a friendship POV, I’m not sure how this was a savvy business decision. Though I guess that wasn’t the priority. Nicolas fires them immediately, and Sylvie’s retort is that JVMA’s treatment of Pierre just showed her who she was really in business with, which is why she doesn’t want to be in business with them after all. Emily calls Sylvie her hero. I mean, yes! Duh! Where have you been? Sylvie’s reply: “I just made an enemy of the most powerful family in fashion.” Thrilling! Could’ve used this much earlier in the season, but whatever, I’ll take it now!

In the morning, Emily runs into a suspiciously happy Gabriel. Camille is back. They had a great conversation and their relationship is stronger than ever. My big question is this: Did they finally just decide to open up their relationship?? Not to suggest that polyamory solves all ills, but in this specific case, I do feel like they could basically address all their issues by giving nonmonogamy a try. It would certainly make things interesting for Emily!

Emily in Paris Recap: Never Say Die