The 13 best gay dating apps and sites of 2023

If you identify as LGBT, finding love on dating apps is significantly harder. Your dating pool seriously shrinks and fewer options mean fewer opportunities to meet someone special. For that reason, it's super important to make sure you're downloading the best gay dating apps or looking at the best LGBT dating sites.

After all, love it or loathe it, an increasing number of relationships start online, especially for LGBT people. Grindr, one of the best gay dating sites, has no fewer than 700,000 registered users in London alone. That’s a whole lot of people looking for love.

I was footloose and fancy free when Grindr first launched in 2009, revolutionising dating for gay men. Since then I've followed the explosion in dating apps, some of which have come and gone (Facebook Dating has not proved popular) while others have stayed around and got better and better.

The mainstream apps also deserve credit for the steps they've taken to create a more inclusive atmosphere: Tinder, Bumble and Hinge now offer lots of sexual orientation and gender identity options and have millions of registered users.

For this article I've reviewed 13 of the best apps and websites for LGBT dating. They all serve very different needs, so if one doesn’t work, in the words of the immortal Aaliyah, dust yourself off and try again.

The best LGBT dating apps and sites, at a glance

Best dating app for gay men - Grindr
Best dating app for lesbian women - Her
Best dating app for gay, bi, trans and queer men - Scruff
Best dating app for relationships - eHarmony
Best dating app for non-binary, gender-fluid and transgender people - Taimi

How we chose the best dating apps and sites

To start, I looked for the most popular dating apps with the most users and the best word of mouth, which included Hinge, Zoosk, Grindr, Her and Scruff. I then looked at the best dating apps for different categories, including serious relationships, casual dating, free and paid.

To fully understand the user experience of those apps that I haven't tried personally, I spoke to members of the LGBT community whose personal feedback helped shape my final selection.

Best LGBT dating apps and sites

Best dating app for gay men, 10/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
27 million users worldwide
Search tags to find others based on their interest
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Grindr brands itself as the world's largest dating app for gay, bi, trans, and queer people, but it's particularly the ideal gay paradise for men who are looking for experienced partners. It's also a place for bisexual men to experiment with a bigger user base. Instead of swiping to match, you'll get a collage of people who are close location-wise.

Grindr lacks the boundaries other apps provide and many users, just looking to hook up, will let you know that they're not in it for small talk: that warning may come in the form of an unsolicited pic.

That's not to say it's not for relationships. A lot of men meet their forever person on Grindr. But on the surface, it's a tool for quick, casual encounters. Men in small towns with a meager queer population are much more likely to find a connection here than on Tinder or eHarmony.

Best dating app for lesbian, bisexual, and queer femmes, 10/10

Free to register
10 million users worldwide
Apples App Store Editors’ Choice Award recipient three years running
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Although Her was made as a dating app, it in some way functions as a social media app. It has a feed much like Facebook’s, that allows you to see what others on the app are doing. For example, there's an event page to view upcoming queer events in your area and there is also a function to join “communities,” which allows you to meet people with similar interests. Of course, Her can also be used to swipe left or right for a soul mate, but its extra functions make it more than that.

The major drawback with Her is the paywall. If you want to see someone who has swiped right on you: paywall. If you want to chat with someone who is online near you, but you haven’t matched yet: paywall. If you want to have a decently lengthened conversation with someone you already matched with: paywall. If you have an extra £14.99 a month, you will have a great time. But for those single ladies on a budget, this may not be the one.

Best and safest dating app for gay, bi, trans and queer men, 10/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
15 million users worldwide
Search tags to find others based on their interest
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Scruff is the top-rated and safest dating app for gay, bi, trans, and queer guys. Using Scruff’s search filters, you can connect with the guys you like from your area or around the world. You can customise your profile to let guys know what you’re into and can even flirt with them by sending a woof.

Scruff prioritises security and offers 24/7 support for the LGBTQ community. Unlike other apps, message history, photos, and videos sync across your devices and never get lost.

Best dating app for love and longterm relationships, 9/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
5 million users in the UK
LGBT inclusive
Available online, on the Apple App Store and Google Play

While many dating apps are hotbeds for hook-ups, eharmony is all about finding true love. The website was founded in 2000 and pledged to match serious daters via an algorithm of in-depth questioning, which weeds out the impatient and guarantees that those on the site actually really want to be there. You’re offered specific daily matches within your location and you can’t browse elsewhere, so no meaningless swiping here.

Because of this, eharmony has been seen as a place for an older crowd, but this is changing. While for most of the site’s history the average age of users was 36 to 37 years old, it is now closer to 30.

They are committed to providing a platform that’s safe, inclusive and welcoming LGBT members and often publish blogs and tell love stories to demonstrate this – which, I won’t lie, can sometimes feel a little tokenistic.

It’s free to register and download the app, send ‘smiles’ and pre-written Icebreakers to get the conversation started. However, you need to subscribe for customised messages and unlimited access to your match’s profile. Subscription costs from £7.95 per month for 24 months.

Best dating app for non-binary, gender-fluid and transgender people, 9/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
8 million users worldwide
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Taimi was originally launched for gay men but has now expanded to become an inclusive social network for the wider LGBTQ+ community. It functions as a social networking platform as well as a dating app, allowing you to create posts, stories, groups and playlists and to customise your feed based on your preferences.

One interesting feature is the ability to look for users in a specific location, not just your own, which is intended to help frequent travellers, business people and tourists make LGBT connections in new places. Taimi is good for queer users looking for meaningful connections, whether platonic, romantic or just social.

Best dating app for meaningful connections, 9/10

Free membership
5.5 million members worldwide
LGBT inclusive
Available on the Apple App Store, Google Play and Apple Aptoide

Hinge is all about encouraging actual conversation, rather than just meaningless likes that never go anywhere. In January this year Hinge, with support from GLAAD, released new conversation starters for profiles, specifically for LGBT users to help the community better connect based on similarities, interests, and compatibility.

Instead of cheesy questionnaires and spam emails about the 50 winks you've received, Hinge uses ice-breakers and lets you like up to eight people per day. Instead of swiping, connections are made by liking or commenting on another person's answers or photos.

Prompts range from "Two truths and a lie" to "Does hiking on a Sunday morning seem viable to you too?" Conversations are hidden after 14 days of inactivity to keep the focus on matches who are taking meeting seriously.

The top five cities in the UK for LGBT Hinge daters are London, Birmingham, Manchester, Bristol and Belfast, so if you are looking for love in any of these cities, I’d get downloading now.

Best LGBT dating site that hetero folks also use, 9/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
40 million users worldwide
LGBT inclusive
Available online, on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Zoosk is one of the most popular gay dating apps and diverse dating sites out there. As it caters to the general market and LGBT singles, the main appeal of Zoosk is its number of members.

With 40 million singles in nearly 80 countries, it’s easy to find a prospective match whether you’re looking for a fun date or a serious relationship. View prospective matches on the carousel, or use the SmartPick feature, which gives you personalised matches using Zoosk’s unique technology.

Another special feature Zoosk has is the Mega Flirt tool, which lets you send the same icebreaker question to several users at once. So if you are struggling to make the first move or don’t know what to say, you do now!

Best dating app for bears, 8/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
10 million users worldwide
Caters predominantly to gay men referred to as bears
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Are you a bear? Are you into bears? If you have tried gay dating apps where “bears” are only given their own category and do not represent the majority of the members on the app, then chances are that your experience was less than spectacular.

If you have been looking for a gay dating app that is focused primarily on the bear community, Growlr is your safest bet. Growlr is a dating app catering to a particular group of the gay community called “bears,” which are typically huge, rugged, hairy, and masculine gay men.

Around since 2014, Growlr uses the slogan, “more bears in more places.” You can search for bears by checking who is online and who is located near you. Look at the check-ins and bars feature to see which bears are hanging out close to where you are.

If you are interested in a Growlr member, all you have to do is click on the chat button on their profile to start connecting.

Best social media app for LGBT people, 7/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
40 million users worldwide
Best for browsing and making friends
Available on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Blued is for LGBT people who like to share video streams with the people who follow them. The app is more suited for those seeking to build large followers and make loose connections than those in search of a specific type of person to date. If you are looking for true love, it may prove disappointing.

Blued profiles feature the basic info provided in the signup process. The profile content often takes up the whole screen, so there’s no need to scroll down, as one can see the vital info like the member’s name, age, location, etc. The brief profile content could be because this platform is focused on matching members for casual dating. Instead of a detailed profile that gives you a more profound knowledge of an individual, looks matter the most here at Blued.

Best dating site for older gay people, 9/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
70,000 users in the UK
LGBT inclusive
Available online, on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Many popular gay dating apps have a reputation for frivolous fun rather than more serious relationships. It can be tough to meet someone who shares your preferences, lifestyle and is also looking for a long-term partner. And the truth is that it can get harder as you get older.

This is where Silver Singles comes in. As a dating site focused on over 50s dating, it offers more mature singles a platform to enjoy serious, senior gay dating. You can download it for Android or Apple smartphones and access your profile on your phone or tablet.

Similarly, to eHarmony, Silver Singles publishes blogs and tells love stories from LGBT community members but due to its target audience of over 50’s and their expert knowledge and stats, it comes from a place of knowing as opposed to generalisation.

Best for sheer number of LGBT users, 8/10

Free membership
Over 50 million users worldwide
LGBTQ inclusive
Available on the Apple App Store, Google Play and Apple Aptoide

Credit where credit is due. Tinder has worked hard over the past few years to increase its understanding of the dating landscape and has therefore become one of the most inclusive and LGBT friendly dating apps on the market. Last year, Tinder reported that one in five of their matches were LGBT+.

Vanity does have a part to play, as the photo-heavy app with two billion views per day, allows you to swipe right to potential partners, then message and arrange a date. This can lead to a lack of substance as profiles are not as detailed as on other apps. You can include your name, job, company, education, location and links to your Instagram and Spotify accounts..

Best dating app for safe connections, 8/10

Free membership
22 million users worldwide
LGBT inclusive
Available online, on the Apple App Store and Google Play

Bumble is designed around the simple idea that women make the first move. A Bumble profile lets you write a bio, answer prompts, include up to six photos, fill out basic info like your job and education, and add flags indicating factors like what type of relationship you're looking for and whether you want kids. Plus, you can connect Spotify to let people see what you've been jamming out to.

In same-sex matching, either person has the power to make the first move, but there's a 24-hour time limit to start the chat after you match with someone. In Bumble chats, you're able to send GIFs and voice messages. The app is free to use but you can upgrade to Bumble Boost, where you can see users who have already ‘liked’ you, for £11.16 per month for 6 months or even just £2.49 for the day.

Best dating site for serious relationships, 9/10

Free membership (with limited functionality)
220,000 members worldwide
LGBT inclusive
Available online, on the Apple App Store and Google Play

The Telegraph Dating site is a straightforward way to meet like-minded singles. With many thousands of users identifying as gay, this may be just the site for you.

When setting up your free profile, simply describe the type of person you’re searching. Then, browse the site and view others’ profiles; once you find someone who you feel is a good match, send them a message.

A free membership allows you to read messages from potential matches and reply with a one-liner. Only paying subscribers can start conversations and write personal, customised messages. It costs from £12 per month for 12 months for a subscription. For an additional £10 per month, you can upgrade to Premium, where anyone can reply to your messages for free.

FAQ

What are the most popular gay dating sites?

The most popular gay dating sites are Grindr, Scruff and Her. Many apps which only catered to heterosexuals are now much more inclusive with the most popular being Tinder, Hinge and eHarmony.

What are the best free gay dating apps?

Most gay dating apps are free, such as Grindr, Scruff and Her, however, to access advanced features they do require a monthly subscription which can range from £4.99 to £27.99.

Are gay dating apps different from straight dating apps?

They are both very similar, but you will want to do your research to make sure the app you are using is the best one to find what and who you are looking for.

How to best to approach LGBT dating apps?

With LGBT dating apps, it generally pays to keep it simple and allow your personality to shine through naturally. It also pays to make sure you're treating whoever you're chatting to, however anonymous they may seem, with respect (that feels like obvious advice, but you'd be surprised).

How to avoid dating scams?

Dating expert James Preece from jamespreece.com shares his tips on how to avoid scammers:

If you’re suspicious about a profile, report it to the dating website or app so they can investigate it.
Don’t be afraid to question their authenticity directly – if they are genuine they won’t mind you trying to verify them.
Remember, scammers may spend months building a relationship with you and will only ask for money once you’re emotionally involved.
Ask a friend for advice. Since they are not as emotionally involved as you, they may be able to see something you can’t.
Look out for fake or stolen photographs. You can use sites like TinEye.com to check the authenticity of a photo and you can try doing a reverse image search on Google (by clicking on the camera logo in the search bar and uploading an image) to see if they are using a fake picture.
Never give out too much personal information, such as your home address, phone number or email.
Consider setting up a new email address to use for online dating and perhaps even get a cheap Pay As You Go phone to use for making phone calls.