Why Am I So Angry? How To Control Anger Issues, Impulsive Feelings & Negative Emotions

By: Unwritten Staff

Emotions represent the most present, pressing, and sometimes, painful force in our lives. We are guided by both our positive and negative emotions every day.

We assume risks because we’re excited thinking about new prospects. We cry because we’ve been hurt and we make sacrifices because we love.

Undoubtedly, our emotions rule our thoughts, intentions, and actions with superior authority to our rational minds. But when we react too quickly according to our emotions, we often make impulsive decisions that we might regret later.

The agility of our impulse control mechanisms and our ability to handle emotions like anger affect how we are perceived by the people around us.

For example, if we are laughing or even smile during a serious meeting, we’re likely to get resentful looks from the others present in the room.

Just like many other things in our life, emotions must be perceived with a sense of moderation and logical perspective.

Negative emotions, like rage, envy or bitterness, tend to get out of control, especially immediately after they’ve been triggered. After a while, they can grow very fast, slowly conditioning the mind to function on detrimental feelings and leaving us with a short temper.

Shortly after that, they will dominate our daily life. Are you wondering how to control you emotions, and avoid overreacting under all kinds of circumstances?

If you wonder why you're so angry all the time, follow these simple tips below on how to control anger issues and get your negative feelings back under your control quickly.

1. Don’t react right away

Reacting immediately to emotional triggers can be a huge error. It is certain that you’ll say or do something you’ll definitely deplore later.

Try to take a deep breath and steady the hysterical impulse. Keep on breathing deeply for a couple of minutes until you feel how your muscles relax and your heart rate comes back to normal.

As you become calmer, try to realize that this situation is only temporary.

2. Replace your thoughts

Negative emotions make negative thoughts reappear. Whenever you have to face an emotion which is making you feel or think something bad, throw it out of your mind and supply it with a different thought.

You can think about someone who makes you happy or remember an event or situation that made you smile.

If we allow our emotions to dictate the ways we should live our lives, this can lead to anxiety and depression. It may even have a negative impact on our health and our relationships.

3. Find a healthy escape

Once your emotion is handled, you’ll need to release it in a healthy way. Emotions should never be suppressed.

You should call somebody or go see someone you trust and tell them what happened.

Hearing a different opinion from yours develops your awareness. For example, you can discover your authentic self and learn how to control your emotions through writing.

You can conceive your own “Happy Book” and fill it with thrilling and peaceful memories.

You can write down inspirational quotes next to photos from different happy moments you had in the past.

This activity will help free your being from any repressed sentiments and is a great anger management technique.

4. Be aware and forgiving of your emotional triggers

Your emotional triggers may be your best friend or even your family members.

Try to avoid toxic people, even if you love them.

It is so difficult to control our emotions when we spend time with people who push our buttons in the wrong way.

Try to forgive them! When you excuse someone, you detach. You disconnect yourself from the resentment, the jealousy, the envy or rage within you.

5. Look at the larger picture

Every event in our life, either good or bad, is part of a higher purpose. Wisdom is what you need now!

You must be able to analyze the past and pull out the meaning of any given situation. You might not understand it from the very beginning, but, after a while, you will be able to see the larger picture.

And, you will then realize that there exists an ultimate purpose in everything we do.

Self-control isn’t as difficult to achieve as we think. Emotions can either rule our lives or we can control them.

Worrying about everything and losing your temper leads to a very unhappy life. They will eventually cause you more stress and be damaging to your health.

In the end, all the efforts you will make to control your negative emotions will actually teach you that it's up to you to decide if you feel good or not.

Unwritten is a lifestyle site that covers mental health and self-care. They offers tips for dealing with emotions and self-improvement.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.